Out of the Frying Pan...
You know those old video games with the fighting and the running commentary from the "announcer?" As they beat the crap out of each other you hear the announcer gleefully report "Body blow! Body blow!"
I got the breath knocked out of me yesterday.
My *coughtwentiethcough* class reunion is coming up, and long ago I registered with a classmates site to keep track, just in case there was some doings coming up. Apparently there are, but not listed on that site. I forgot about it. Then I get an e-mail saying "Boatman has sent you an e-mail at the classmate site!"
Boatman is the Bigun's biodad.
Boatman has not contacted me in twelve years.
Boatman's last words to me made clear he didn't want anything to do with the Bigun or myself.
Boatman's e-mail says "Please contact me at 555-0123, nothing important, I just wanted to check in with you."
I sent back my e-mail address with this:
Um, yeah, Hi. My e-mail is fish@me.com. You can start there. -f
I know it was a bit harsh, but here the Bigun turns 18 and then Boatman thinks it's a good time to try to find us? I'm not sure what to do with that. At any rate, he says he's been trying to get in touch for a while, and that he's sorry for the way he acted twelve years ago.
What do I do with that? Especially since the Bigun had a big crisis two years ago about her biodad and I couldn't tell her anything.
I did not need this.
posted by Fishie @ 11:22 AM
4 Comments:
My niece had a similar crisis when she was 12. Her mom wouldn't tell her anything, so she asked me what I knew, which wasn't much at all, I don't even know the guy's name, just that he was tall and my niece was the product of a one night stand. So the story goes Mr Dad was fresh out of the army home from desert storm and a virgin. My sis, um, "deflowered" him and became pregnant. Mr Dad heard about the pregnancy through the grapevine, offered to delay going to college, marry sis and help her bring up her 2 kids. Sis declined, lied about the parentage, and sent Mr Dad back to school. Nobody wants to tell a 12 year old kid that she is the product of a one night stand pity screw. Or in the case of my mom, telling her kid that she is the product of stupid teenage sex with a guy that turned out to be really really gay. It's never a good situation, ever, and I feel for you and the Bigun. Personally, now that Boatman has made contac, what I would do is give his info to Bigun, let her make contact if she so chooses, and as for myself tell Boatman to piss up a rope and slide down the dry side, with the caveat that if he upsets MY daughter at all, his body will never be found.
But of course, I don't know the whole situation, and if there are mitigating factors that I don't know, feel free to tell ME to piss up a rope and slide down the dry side. ((hugs))
I don't know the situation either, but to me it sounds like he knows she's 18, so he's now off the hook for child support and is therefore "safe" to contact her. It is a hard situation! I'll pray for you!
Wow. That would be shocking to hear from him after so long. Best wishes to you (and Bigun).
Anon, being 18 does not stop child support. If Boatman owes, he will be forced to pay.
Hugs Fishie
Post a Comment
<< Home