We're getting closer
Nearly time for NaBloPoMo. I want to get in the habit of adding a little something in these spaces, but I hesitate to put down the mundane stuff I'm doing.
I went to election law training for election judges. I went to training on the voting machines, and have to repeat it because the team we got stuck training with on "fast track" moved agonizingly slowly. I got roped into helping with the Halloween event in the community center. I subbed for another teacher this week, and got to play with the older students, but I had about an hour's notice and barely time to read their assignments before stepping up and winging it.
I also got an e-mail from the Bigun's biodad, Boatman, about her emotional state. She feels "cut off" apparently, and not connected to the family. Hmmmm, when I have to go to WORK to see my daughter, that tells me she ain't around all that much to be seen and relate to. Other than that, I haven't laid eyes on the girl since her car had trouble weeks ago. Cut off? Come on!
I'm taking a parenting class, which really is fun, based around letting kids suffer the natural consequences of their behavior. Love and Logic, it's called. The premise is that kids making mistakes earlier in life over small things will cost them less in the long run. They get to practice making good decisions early, when the stakes aren't so high, so they will be equipped to make decisions when they have a lot more on the line.
An example: The kids are fighting in the car. You could:
a) Pull over and pick up a book and start reading until they finish
b) Tell them you charge $20 an hour to listen to fighting
c) Tell them to get out of the car and walk
d) Tell them the car only goes 15 mph when you have to hear them bicker
My personal favorite is b, but any of these would work. Now, I don't have kids in the age ranges where they are together enough to fight, so this never applied to me. But think of the possibilities!
"You can clean your room, or I charge $8 an hour to clean it for you."
"You can take your vitamins and wear your coat, or you can choose to pay the $30 copay when we have to take you to the doctor."
Hee! Imagine it! Submitting a bill to your ten-year-old for cleaning! I love it!
We're in the middle of the "stay up as late as you want, but get up on time" experiment. So far the LC hasn't made it to sleep before 10:30 any night for a week, but she has made it up and to school on time every day. That's been fun, because now JJ and I can watch Corner Gas in peace. Still, it feels so WRONG!
I'll report later on the results.
posted by Fishie @ 9:54 AM
2 Comments:
Mr. Chili and I read Love and Logic LONG before we had kids and we TOTALLY bought into the concept. It's BRILLIANT. My girls are already learning how to make decent choices and decisions (though, of course, not all the time - who does?) and I'm hoping that this continues as they get older.
Punkin' Pie, my oldest, learned VERY EARLY that we follow through on our "promises" of consequences for behavior. "If you keep kicking the table, you'll spend the rest of dinner in the car." She kept kicking, and I told my husband to ask the waiter to box our meals. I sat in the front seat and read for the better part of an hour and twenty minutes (we were celebrating my MIL's birthday) while Punkin' Pie in turns screamed and cried, negotiated and cajoled, begged and pleaded, and finally just gave up and sniveled.
It was the LAST time she kicked the table....
I use some techniques from Love and Logic, especially the one "if you don't get ready, I will call the babysitter and you will pay for her to watch you while I take your brothers to church". They *hate* the idea that they would have to pay for that so it works for us. :)
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