I'm not that girl

J and I were shopping for stuff for teacher lunch today, and after traipsing all through the aisles, knocking things over and nearly breaking them, I was ready to leave. It was her event but I had already committed to a long list of baking and cooking.

See, we started out in produce, where I showed her how English cucumbers could be used as a weapon. These hummers were over 15" long and heavy, and we needed a pair for the salad. After that we hit canned goods, dairy, frozen foods and every other corner of the store. I kept forgetting things and we'd have to backtrack. Plus I had a bum cart with the wheel that won't cooperate, so I was banging into wine displays, cell phone displays and other carts.

We'd forgotten pretzels, so we had to schlep over to the chip aisle. I grabbed just two bags, because really, there are only so many pretzels one can coat in chocolate before one explodes. J asked how many more I needed. I said "None! What, are you trying to chain me to the kitchen ALL DAY?"

Unbeknownst to me, right beside us was a lady who must have heard this as a lovers' spat. According to J, she gave us a disgusted, dirty look and shrank away to another aisle. When J told me what happened, we doubled over in the middle of the beer aisle laughing so hard. It certainly perked up the rest of the shopping trip.

Finally we made it to checkout and ran both orders we were buying and J took over cart-pushing, announcing loudly "I'm the man of the house, I'm pushing the cart!"

And who was there to hear this comment? Oh, yes, the disapproving lady from the chip aisle.

A wonderful lesson on thinking before one passes judgement. And on the fact that a pair of 15" cucumbers in your cart say a lot about you when you shop with a friend.